Collaborative Divorce Counseling | Will a Collaborative Divorce Work For Me?

You may be asking yourself whether you and your spouse are good candidates for Collaborative Divorce Counseling.  Here is a list of 7 attributes that will help you determine whether you and your spouse are good candidates.   The more that you and your spouse are able to achieve these attributes, the better suited you may be for a Collaborative Divorce.

Collaborative Divorce Counseling is good for us if:

  1. Ability to articulate goals, reflect on them and understand that they may not be achievable in full.
  1. Ability to shift from “blamer” toward active participant and problem solver.
  1. Ability to focus on the unfolding future despite heavy emotional burdens; for example, anger, depression, resentment, grief, etc.
  1. Ability to tolerate negative emotions, whether your own or your spouse’s.
  1. Willingness to develop and utilize coping skills to think clearly and modulate behavior or emotions during the collaborative meetings.
  1. Ability to see the viewpoint of your spouse.
  1. Ability to form solid connections with members of their collaborative team as reflected in the ability to have frank discussions, process feedback, and make decisions and re-decisions.

Tanya E. Prioste and Lydia E. Crandall are Partners in the Family Law Section of Lakin Spears, LLP, in Palo Alto, California they help couples with Collaborative Divorce Counseling.